SPOIL-FREE SUMMARY
The twins have to take a test where they grant three wishes to someone. If they are judged worthy, they pass, if not, they lose their abilities for a year. So John sets of with Groanin and Phillipa goes off alone. But there is also the problem of the homeostasis, which Nimrod discovers is off and goes to investigate.
THE ANNOYANCE OF PHILLIPA
Phillipa still comes off rather unlikable. In one scene, she is horrified to discover a place where murderers and many other criminals are kept is...not very nice. She never seems to understand reality because she lives in a bubble. And in another, she asks if someone knows that “synthetic fur is the ethical choice”? Any normal person would say that making animals suffer and die when synthetic fur is affordable and widely available is immoral.
Whenever she tries to express herself in any way, it comes across so awkward. Like when she has to handle a tough situation: “...she felt entirely equal to the situation that presented itself. And she supposed that was all down to what Nimrod called 'experience'. The kind of experience that told it just might be a good idea to enter the room invisibly.”
Who thinks that way? I could maybe understand Nimrod phrasing something so oddly, but a fourteen year old girl? Any normal person would write: Having been through her share of adventures, Phillipa knew it would be a good idea to enter invisibly.
Also, when Phillipa turns some bad guys into animals, and they accidentally get killed, she is suddenly reminded of how her mom killed people in the book three. And she doesn't want to be like her. But at the time, and in every book after, Phillipa never cared at all. Does Kerr not think we remember the other books?
Also, after Phillipa is separated from the others on the flying carpet, she meets Nimrod. She completely breaks down, babbling and sobbing and becoming hysterical. We have had five books where people have almost died and she never once reacted this way. It feels like another character altogether. Don't get me wrong, I would love for this to be considered development but it can't. It's just inconsistent. Development would be gradual and over time. Not out of the blue.
NIMROD
Nimrod'a charm is completely dead, as it was murdered in the last book. He keeps feeling less and less realistic, as if he is some sort of god that lives outside of regular society and all of the stupid, little people. He hilariously asserts “how little he knows” when he has some sort of spiritual experience. This coming from the man who seems to think he knows everything.
RULES OF REALITY
I do feel the story has kind of lost any sense of logic or rules that we must play by. New things are thrown in to the point where I don't even try to make sense of it.
When Groanin almost dies, he is in purgatory. When Rakshasas dies, he is reincarnated. So basically whatever you believe is real and applied to you?
Does that mean murderers that believe they are good people get rewarded in the afterlife? What if one believes he will meet a loved one in the afterlife, and that loves one believes there is no afterlife? Do you get to meet a fake loved one? Doesn't that make everything false, even the afterlife?
And later it is asserted that God is real and there is proof of that. So God made it so every religion is true and whatever you want to believe is real? Everything is so contradictory and poorly explained its as if the author expects his readers to have no real sense of critical thinking.
LETS LEARN A LESSON
Stories benefit from characters learning to change and grow. It shows character growth and makes a character relatable. But in order to not seem preachy, an author must be delicate to show and not tell. Unfortunately, Kerr does not know how to do that.
Nimrod actually says that he has spoiled the twins. Which is odd, because throughout the series, the fact that they come from an affluent family is almost never mentioned which would be the real source of their spoiling.
He wants to teach them about “economic and social reality”. So he makes them stay at a crappy hotel for a day. And even though he makes it so the twins cannot use djinn power, it makes little to no difference on the rest of their lives. They will just use it whenever they want to after this event.
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO CONSEQUENCES?
The idea of using djinn power (as mentioned in the first book) and using up your own power has been completely discarded. There are never any negative consequences for the main characters (only Dybbuk or Zadie). There is a threat of the twins losing their powers, but it never gets brought up again. You would think two teenagers with god-like powers might cause some trouble. But apparently not. Not even tempted, it seems.
RACIST GROANIN?
In a weird part of the book, Nimrod straight out calls Groanin a racist. It wasn't funny, just weird. Groanin has been complaining about foreign cultures and lands for five books and been Nimrod's butler for a long time. If he was really such a horrible person, wouldn't this have been called out long ago? Wouldn't Nimrod have fired him?
No one really believes he is racist. He just hates traveling and the inconveniences it carries. He always stereotypes races and cultures but he doesn't actually believe himself to be better simply because of his race. We know because he never treats anyone badly nor says one race is better than another.
JERUSALEM-THE UNCOMFORTABLE CITY
One of my favorite parts of the series is the places that are traveled to. Every city, every culture explored and examined with a curious and appreciate eye. Venice? Beautiful. China? Amazing. India? Great. Jerusalem? It's an uncomfortable place.
Yes, Nimrod actually says he feels uncomfortable there. This is a djinn who argued for the eating of dogs, mind you.
This was the most uncomfortable thing I have ever read in any book, let alone this series. I was completely taken aback. I was expecting something flowery and vague, about how it was the birthplace of the three of the worlds largest religions and full of history.
What I got was an awkward rambling about how there were seven religions there and they were all fighting. (What religions? Who knows? He doesn't' say.) And the hotel he was staying at had been hit by a terrorist attack (What kind of terrorist? I don't know. Just a terrorist.) Yes, there is a lot of turmoil in the middle east. But Kerr doesn't seem to know how to talk about this in any real sense. Words like “Islam” and “Judaism” are never used. Are the readers supposed to be too stupid to know or so smart he doesn't need to be specific about anything?
TIME TRAVEL-SPOILERS
Time travel is used to make it so the story never happened. I don't care that it's unoriginal, just that it doesn't make much sense. It's stated that since two characters who helped them on the adventure are staying at Shangri-la, then when they go back, this adventure will never have happened. In that case, how did they get there to stay in the first place? Just seemed trying to be clever but coming off as illogical.
CONCLUSION
It was inevitable that a story couldn't be carried forever by a unique world. The characters of John and Phillipa refuse to develop in any way at at all, while charming characters like Nimrod and Groanin have become arrogant and condescending. I can't help feeling that so many aspects of the book felt weird because politics were pushed awkwardly into the story. Kerr seems to forget every other book he has written in this series and hopes you do too. There just isn't any consistency. I give “The Five Fakirs of Faizabad” one and half stars.
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